Thursday, June 9, 2011

how to snap out of it

I would generally sway from "snap out of it" but I think it can apply. I'm not talking mental instability, more in the lines of irritability. You can snap out of a bad mood and such. Sometimes I rather not but other times, okay, sure, I'll snap out of it. First, if you have children, just go hug them. You know that'll do it. So if you don't really want to snap out of it, don't hug them. But that will work damn near every time. Probably wise and ideal to hug your children a minimum of ten or fifteen times a day anyway, until they get too teenage/cool/grownup for that sort of thing. So the failsafe for "snapping out of it" - hug your children, tell them you love them. That simple.

Next, read Shel Silverstein. You can go with Peanuts or Calvin & Hobbes, but I'd stick with Shel. It's like saying Dylan or the Beatles. Can't really go wrong but I'd take Shel. I'm inadvertantly comparing Shel Silverstein with Bob Dylan and Charles Schultz / Bill Watterson with Lennon / McCartney. Not sure what that means. Probably nothing.

Another, do yoga. Find it on demand on your little digital cable box or youtube. Don't start with the beginner's stuff. If you're into yoga, fine and good and I'm all for yoga in all its various stages and methods. But for this purpose, go to advanced yoga. And turn on some loud music you don't especially care for. This only takes ten to fifteen minutes. You'll get into it and forget what all the fuss was about.

Get yourself some old television sets. I don't care where you get them from. I don't need to know that. Find some quick DIY articles/videos and make something out of them. Do the fish tank thing if you can't think of something more clever. The easier the project the better. Just sayin.

So there's some. I'll finish up this line of mumbles at a later time. I was in a pissed off mood earlier so I should go hug my children real quick...

Wednesday, June 8, 2011


I'm not sure what the future holds. Maybe nothing. Maybe something. One or the other. But one thing I know for sure. I'll be bitter about it. I'm not the brighest bulb but I'm not no ignerint tool neither.
I find myself interested in a slew of things of late. Quantum physics for one. I don't understand it really at all. But that 80s show sure was cool. I assume quantum physics had something to do with Scott Bakula jumping through time and strangers' bodies to "make right what once went wrong". Remember when Sam jumped into himself as a teenager? Good stuff. I'm also getting into the Science channel and that stuff with Morgan Freeman narrating, whatever that is. Mysteries of the Universe stuff. They always have the genius space guy, the cool Asian man with flowing white hair. He's the coolest. I also am more and more enjoying invading the lives of others. Hitching rides, buying groceries for strangers, showing up and weddings and funerals. People's reactions when something comes into their small worlds is so interesting to see. It never gets old. I try not to do the same thing more than a couple times. But when I run out of ideas the reaction is still new because the person is a new victim. I might start posting video of my excursions. For now I'll content myself with writing about it.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Love. Religion. Politics. Pick one.

Love, religion, politics. The holy trinity of pain and suffering. Never combine any two of these unless they are already combined. Yea, yea, there are some remote and random tales of merging of the three. But like R-O-U-S's - I don't believe they exist. Not in whole. Not really at all. Sure, you might meet your spouse at church, or maybe over a first date someone accidentally spills it that they are a closet conservative. Two might work, not all three. Don't attempt it. It will fail. Maybe later, likely sooner. Then again, how in hell would I know. I'm single. Not religious, not in a while at least, and apolitical. Still though. Just sayin.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

somethin's not right

Yea, something's wrong. With me. Pains in odd, and personal, places. Waking up in odd positions and places. It's not passing out really. Maybe it is, but not what I thought of as passing out. Alcohol not involved. Drugs not involved. I seldom drink alcohol and do not do drugs. The intense pains though, really annoying.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

how to get smart and retain knowledge

Laughable that I'd even joke of such a thing. I have little knowledge and retain little of what I have. Nevertheless.
You need to read. Read a lot. But more importantly read the right stuff. What's "the right stuff" is up to the reader.
History, law, science, these subjects matter and have far reaching reciprocal value.
Talk to people who are much smarter than you. Do it regularly.
Take a week and spend just an hour a day on a single subject. Anything - Frank Lloyd Wright, local economy, iphone apps of interest, photography, whatever.
But before all that, go to the park. Go to the cemetary and go to the nearest urban downtown. thoughts and silences and snippets of life you'll see there are not quantifiable.

Monday, September 14, 2009

how to write the great american novel

How would I know? If I did, I'd have done it instead of typing that in a blog that no one will ever see. Type "how to write a novel" in a google search. You'll see hundreds of links. Different procedures and methods. Those are all crap. The way to do it is to simply do it. The beauty is the simplicity. First you have to find your voice, your writer's voice. You need to tell the story, but in your writer's voice. How to find the voice? By writing. Just sit and write. Doing so will bring out that voice and eventually the story will come. So simple a moron could do it.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

how to get hit in the head with a bike chain

This one's simple. Walk through my front yard, half way to my house, smoking a cigarette, talking loudly on your cell phone at midnight. Then show up an hour later and throw a tomato at my front door. Then come back forty-five minutes later looking for more trouble. That's when I sneak out from the bushes and sling a bike chain at your face. Then your knees, then your back as you begin to crawl away. Consider reading or video games rather than skalking through a peaceful neighborhood.